Possum Attempts to Thwart Trip of a Lifetime

Possum Attempts to Thwart Trip of a Lifetime

                  Or Katoomba to Manila via Darwin

On the day of our departure I awoke early to the sounds of a frustrated possum attempting to shred a wire barrier, which had been attached to the chimney pots, for precisely this reason. Having slipped into a fitful slumber sometime after 2 am (I know this for a fact as we had a phone-call at 1 am), I was dismayed to find the numerals 5:02 staring impassively back at me.

Yep – three days before we were due to depart for Manila and a ten-month absence – a possum the size of a supersized cat had moved in.  We called various possum welfare organisations, only to discover that there was no service to households unless the possum was injured. After a momentary temptation to immediately fulfil this requirement to avoid any bureaucratic obstacle we hired a maverick - Garry the Possum-man. It was Garry’s handiwork the poss was desperate to undo.

Even on this, the day of departure, we were up early finishing jobs. Today it was Paull weeding, carting soil away from a longstanding mound and dumping it inside the chook-run and mulching several recent plantings, Heather vacuuming the house ready for the new occupants and preparing food for the first leg of our voyage.  Our friend Judy had very kindly constructed a magnificent possum-house with a verandah, awning, shag-pile carpet and even a name-plate – ‘Chez Poss’. To complete the package the whole structure was then mounted some eight metres above ground with a north-easterly aspect. I was elected to ascend the ladder and site the bungalow.

During this chapter of the operation to salve my conscience for rendering the resident marsupial homeless, I was haunted by the very real possibility of coming around beneath a sea of concerned faces and mention of an ambulance being in close proximity. All the more galling to find that this angry and ungrateful fur-ball had pre-empted our alarm clock by several hours! I decided that pointing my finger-bone at the creature whilst assuming the profile of a lithe Aboriginal hunter might cause the possum to lose its nerve and withdraw. I was sadly mistaken. It proceeded to march across the roof trying its claws on every chimney-pot and punctuating its efforts with grunts and withering sneers at regular intervals.

Finally following a particularly sustained death-ray stare (did I witness, or could I have imagined, a furry one-fingered salute…) it leapt from the roof’s apex into a neighbouring tree with a cavalier flourish and was gone.

Judy very generously drove us to the airport in the big-rig (a Toyota Landcruiser – nothink was going to get in our way). I had visions of Judy getting on the two-way to call up legions of Off-Roaders in the event of a recalcitrant traffic conditions:

“This is Big Bear calling all four-wheel drivers – we’ve got an emergency guys – we need beaucoup rubber on the M4 right now. My buddies are hitching a ride on a big bird out of Botany at 13:30 – I reckon this calls for a C-O-N-V-O-Y!”  The traffic was exceedingly well-mannered.

Waiting for the flight to be readied we ate extortionately priced airport food, went to the toilet a fifth time and tried out a massage chair. Until finally the moment arrived –

“This is your Captain speaking. We regret to inform youse that we seem to have blown a tyre. Nothing to worry about folks – it was almost threadbare anyhow – so sit back and relax while the groundcrew go through some retreads and sort out a new one. (Yeah thanks luv, make mine a double…) We’ll be on our way Tout suite.”

The flight left without further incident at 2:05pm. Darwin was quiet so we arrived in Manila at around midnight Sydney-time.

Over and out,

Paull.